Destroyed infrastructures of development— telephone towers—can be repaired and rebuilt if necessary; bridges can be reconstructed and even power plants can be reinstalled. These may not sound to be much of a problem except for increased financial need, as always. But, the most crucial questions that eat any sensitive heart are - Can anyone repair the loss of women who had to loose their beloved at a very tender age? What about a large number of elderly citizens who have lost their sole breadwinners, and still, who will take responsibility of the several hundreds of children who have turned orphans in course of the ongoing insurgency?

The seven-year-old insurgency in the country matures every next day with “rumours” of peaceful talks. Amid escalated violence, killing and destructions widows of soldiers here in the far western districts still pray for peace so that no more Nepalese sisters lose their spouses like they did.

Early morning, as the glowing sun spreads its wings all over the plains of terai, enthusiastic people hurry towards their farms as it is harvest time again; but for 20-year-old Naina there will be “no more harvesting days” in her life. “I feel, I have lost everything with my husband; the Maoists killed him,” she told us after making sure that we were neither Maoists nor army.

Naina B.K, a lower caste Hindu woman, got married to Ashok B.K three years back. She was just seventeen and her husband twenty, then. A high school pass lady, Naina was living happily with her husband and in-laws but time took a horrible turn four months back, when her husband, a soldier in the Royal Nepalese Army, left home for his duty. “My husband was en-route to Hetauda, when the Maoists killed him planting an ambush on his way,” she recalls but can’t locate the place where it all happened. According to her, her family members did not tell her in detail what had happened because they thought, “she is just a woman and should not be bothered about all the details.” She also does not know about the government paying compensation to the bereaved families.

“I know nothing about the compensation. My father-in-law and other relatives had traveled to Hetauda to meet the people concerned, but after returning home they (her family members) told me nothing,” she laments. She thinks that her family members have not told her anything perhaps because they think “all this happened because of the ill-luck she had brought to the family.”
However, this is not only the story of Naina. According to the Royal Nepalese Army, the total death toll, after the insurgency broke out, has reached above 7000. Many women, of Naina’s age have turned widows and are leading a lonely life. All of them suffer sorrowful lives; the only difference is the degree of suffering. For instance, a widow of a policeman at Khajura, who preferred to be unnamed, said she feels like weeping day and night as her family members treat her cruelly. “They blame me for everything wrong that has been happening after my husband was killed by the Maoists,” she added. It seems that she is reeling under severe depression, which is why she doesn’t like to talk much.

When society and their family members mistreat these women victims, they feel more tortured than losing their husband and their sorrow multiplies day and nights. Though analysts here, citing example of one of the SAARC members Srilanka, say that insurgency can’t be curbed overnight and takes time to stop it. Insurgency in a poor country like Nepal has been very costly and indeed has resulted in a heavy loss. When there is violence, no matter whether the perpetrators are from the army or the rebels side women and children are the ones who suffer more.

Durga Khatri’s husband, Lale Bahadur Khatri teaches in Tharu community. As the Maoists have been targeting teachers in the past her husband can be another victim, she suspects. “The army has a list of Tharu rebels and my husband can be in their list as he teaches Tharus in Bardiya district.” She gets worried when her husband does not return home by four or five in the evening and adds, “When at night, we hear of gun-shots or explosions, my children go mad in terror. They ask me for a safer hideout and I also get panicky.”

Sita Tiwari and Kendra Gurung of Centre of Women’s Development (CWD) have similar views. According to them, women have been facing mental torture since the imposition of emergency, which was imposed due to the violent insurgency. Girls are restricted to their homes, while mothers are left in fear that their sons who have gone for work may not return home safely. A few months back Maoists came to Adarsha High School at Khajura and gave speeches. Parents fear that they will take away village children for their mission. “They may take children from school to join their force. I have heard them doing so,” said Durga Gharti Magar, a student at Mahendra Multiple College. “Women and children suffer most when it is the time of terror,” say almost all the ones interviewed at Khajura.

One can easily gauze how much a woman is terrorised and victimized, if the case of Naina is studied seriously. Her family members have changed in the sense that they now hardly speak to her. Even if they do, it is in a rude manner. Naina remembers the days when her husband was alive. Everyone liked her and shared the household business but now her family members don’t care much about her even as they have put so many restrictions on her. When we reached Khajura village in Nepalgunj to enquire about her, officials at CWD informed that her family members may not let her talk. Thanks to CWD officials, who helped in convincing her in-laws, she could come out for a while to speak to us.

She is supposed to stay at home and look after her twelve-month old daughter. “My family doesn’t want me to go anywhere because they think that by doing so I will not obey them,” she adds in a sorry manner, “I feel bad when I am treated like a mute animal.” She has not thought of re-marrying not because society will criticise her but because she has lost all kinds of desire to do so. She thinks she will not be able to raise her daughter properly if she married another man. “How can I put my daughter’s future at risk?” She queries, “It is a sin.” She likes to live an independent life and wants to become an active member of organisations like CWD and contribute to women’s development. She also aspires to become a teacher, as she is an SLC graduate but she will have to struggle a lot with her family members in any case. 

 

Back to Contents